Progress, Not Perfection
We all fall off the wagon sometimes when we’re working to heal our relationship with consumerism. The important thing is to keep striving for sustainability.
Redefining happiness is a crucial aspect of adopting a more sustainable lifestyle. Many of us who live in Western capitalist societies are conditioned to believe that the acquisition of material items correlates with well-being. Traditional celebrations in the Western world (Christmas, Easter, birthdays, etc.) center around the giving of gifts—literally, the acquisition of more things. “Retail therapy” is a part of our cultural zeitgeist because it’s much easier to address both negative and positive emotions by chasing that temporary dopamine surge than it is to engage in introspection. How are we supposed to define happiness, if it isn’t the achievement of tangible things that we’re taught are representative of success, abundance, and satisfaction?
It’s taken me a long time to understand that I, like most unwitting participants in capitalism, have been using shopping as a proxy for emotional and creative expression. My life has been structured around shopping and acquiring more and more material things—back-to-school shopping, weekend boutique-shopping, online shopping while relaxing on the couch, grocery shopping, Halloween shopping, Christmas shopping, the list goes on. Shopping had become a default activity when there was spare time to fill. Now, I’m actively working on creating a more functional and thoughtful approach to shopping. Grocery shopping is clearly a necessity, but spending hundreds of dollars on Christmas gifts (which is usually accompanied by buying LOTS of things for myself at the same time)? Shopping as a social activity, just because? Not necessary, and certainly not sustainable, both from an environmental and financial standpoint.
Mindless consumerism doesn’t have to control your life. You can choose to buy things only when you actually need them. Defining the “need” part is where things get tricky for me, though. Fashion is a component of my identity, and expressing myself through style is not something that I’m willing to eschew completely. I’m working on developing a more cohesive and polished aesthetic that centers around high-quality, versatile items that compliment one another and can be worn in many creative ways, and that process will occasionally require purchasing new things.
As an example, I’m really feeling the return of flares. (Sorry, Gen Z—while I love your relaxed fit jeans, nothing is more flattering on an ample-thigh physique than a flare, especially a high-waisted flare. The early 2000’s did us dirty with those low-rise flares.) I decided that a sick new pair of flares was necessary to build some of my casual fall looks around. But is that really “necessary”? Do I have other pants that I can wear instead? Yes, of course. And if I were a perfectly sustainable and ethical maximalist, I wouldn’t buy a new pair of pants just because I felt like it. However, the counterpoint to that argument is that the flared style differs from everything else in my wardrobe currently, and fills a “style void” that I’ve been cognizant of when putting together casual outfits. It’s not so much the act of acquiring new things that provides happiness, it’s the act of dressing myself in a creative, flattering, and sophisticated way—that’s a nuance that I can work with.
So if dressing yourself in an extra fabulous way makes you happy, you shouldn’t shame yourself for making thoughtful and intentional purchases here and there. Just do it in a way that makes sense from a sustainability perspective. Buy secondhand, or buy from a retailer that has a solid and transparent track record with sustainability and ethical labor practices. And don’t try to conflate happiness with material purchases. Don’t confuse satisfaction with acquisition. Don’t equate self-actualization with hopping on a trend bandwagon. You don’t always need to express yourself with your wallet.
